Condom Conundrum

I'm 24 and I can say I've never bought condoms *gasp*. That seems so sexually irresponsible of me, and I'm sure someone reading this (or not) is thinking "its 2010, what do you mean?" Now let me state for the record I practice safe sex...I've just never personally purchased the life jacket. I have gone with the significant other to purchase them, just never been the one doing the purchasing. Maybe this has a lot to do with when I was in middle school and a few friends and myself decided to try and buy condoms to see what they looked like up close and personal. And just our luck our teacher walks into the store and decides to have a chat. We quickly stuff the condoms in an oven mitt and never did buy them. Also, I was involved with someone who insisted on being the one who purchased the condoms. He did not trust it if he did not buy it. [I think he had an unhealthy fear of someone trying to 'trap' him or something...but anyway.] That also contributed to my condom conundrum.

Ever since then I've always associated buying condoms with something I'm not suppose to do. Not like its not my responsibility, just that I get this overwhelming anxiety like someone is looking at me and thinking "She isn't suppose to be having sex." And I guess it can be said if I cannot muster the strength and courage to buy condoms I probably should not be having sex (lol). However, I'm sure I am not the only one with this problem.

Also, along with the fear of purchasing condoms, there is the question. How many condoms is TOO many? I know it seems like a silly question, but at what point is it just too many condoms for a girl to have at her disposal. [Yes, it can be said with the state of STDs today there is no such thing as too much, but in this instance I am talking about perception.] At what point is it too much, and a girl is considered a slut. Like if he comes over and I open a drawer and let him choose from a plethora of brands/flavors/and textures..lol. I think then its too much. I've heard that a simple three pack is ideal for a woman, where she looks concerned enough with her health, but isn't giving off the perception that she has sex with so many men she needs her own condom facility. ***I need more men reading my blog so I can get male feedback on these IMPORTANT questions.***

In the end, my approach seems to be working for me, for now. I don't have to deal with the added cost of buying condoms (although I do have to foot the bill for the lingerie when deemed needed) and I can say without a doubt I've never had an STD and I am not someones mom. :D


P.S. But maybe I might psych myself up and waltz into a store sometime in the near future and tackle this fear.

P.P.S. I've been trying thing new thing with my posts, less picture more content (i.e. longer posts..well I'm really trying with extending the length)...what do you think?