Be Fruitful and Multiply!

While doing my usual daily blog reads I stumbled upon an interesting topic that quickly grabbed my attention. From the blog A Belle in Brooklyn:

"What is going to become of African- Americans if all of the educated folks continue to be baby free?...

...The people in our community that need to produce the most are not and the people who need to stop producing, multiply like there is no tomorrow. What will happen to future generations?? We complain that there is a lack (in particular) of well mannnered, educated AA men. But if we are not getting married and having babies and in turn, raising well-mannered, educated AA men, who is to blame?"

Like a puppy my ears perked up and was at attention. Rather alarming at first, but it does bring to the forefront a very important question. Why are the educated, successful, upper crust African Americans not reproducing. Now, that's not to say that NO educated African Americans are having babies. But, in comparison the vast majority of successful African American women are single, childless; and if they do have children, its usually one, or two. I am guilty of this myself. I am educated, I classify myself as successful, yet I am still single, marriage no where in sight, and when that does happen (which it WILL..lol) I only plan on having one child...if any at all.

Are we to blame for the direction our community seems to be headed? Of course well ALL share in the responsibility. Now, don't get me wrong by no means am i saying go out and start having babies like rabbits. However, I cannot deny that the question did not open my eyes a bit. Ok, maybe now I'll have two children (lol); but seriously, WHY are we not reproducing? Why are we not 'training a child up in the way he should go." But in the same token must we give birth to the next generation in order to play an active role in their lives? So maybe we are not ready to have children of our own. That is understandable, I am definitely not ready to have a child. So, can we not in turn nurture the child of another, a child who may not have a parent at home who was afforded the opportunities we were?

Fill-In the Blank

I had a very, interesting conversation with a friend on Sunday about titles when it comes to relationships. Of course he felt they weren't necessary, and of course I thought they were absolutely necessary.

Seriously, when you think about it, whether you acknowledge it or not you are involved in a relationship. The only question is what type of relationship? Only a daily basis we form relationships with everyone we come into contact with. And we define those relationships. So why not define the ones we engage in one a regular basis and on an even more intimate level. For example, we have working relationships with co-workers; friendships; associates; family; everyone in our lives fall into one of these categories and possibly more, all defining the type of relationship we have with them. So why not extend this to our sexual lives. Now, I'm not talking about a fling or one night stand; but those ongoing encounters that seem to extend for months on end with no sense of direct.....

FOOD FOR THOUGHT!

TOMS Shoes

I haven't done a product post in a while, so this one is long overdue and MUCH deserved!

I've seen the commercials, but never really paid much attention. Last week however, while at CGI (Clinton Global Initative) my co-worker was telling me about how super comfortable these shoes were, etc. etc. And how they got free pairs of them last year at CGI. So, what are TOMS Shoes you ask? They have a "one for one" motto. Simply:

TOMS simple One for One commitment to give a pair of new shoes to children in need around the world with every pair sold is revolutionizing the way consumers shop; with TOMS, shopping equals giving. TOMS One for One business model transforms our customers into benefactors, which allows us to grow a truly sustainable business rather than depending on fundraising for support.

I just LOVE that! I will be ordering my pair of TOMS Shoes tonight. I'll have pictures and update when I have them in hand. PLEASE check out the website and see all the GREAT things they are doing, and if you can please order a pair or two or three yourself. :D

New Day

"Say goodbye, say goodbye to the way I was before. Say hello, say hello to a new way."
*song currently playing on my profile, and will be playing for a while...lol.*

This is it, I've been on a roller coaster called relationships, love/like, dating for some time now, and it seems like I just unbuckled myself and walked off. Am I sad? YES! Of course, I would have loved to stay on that ride with him (minus the ups and downs, bumps and humps) but with him, I would've loved to ride that ride. But, things don't always work that way, and apparently some people have to "get their priorities together...things are about to be really hectic, etc." and can't even give a possible projection of anything. So, 8+ months down the drain?

I cried all the way home. Definitely was the little piggy who went "waa waa waa, allll the way home" last night. Took a shower and cried in the shower. I feel like I've been here too many times before. Deja vu. He's a sucky person, a sucky person to me right now. I can't pahtom how after 8+ months you still have to think about things, you're not sure of what, if anything you want from things. Its been more than ample time to digest and reflect. Everyone has busy schedules, I men I'm the Queen of busy schedules, the Queen of doing 10 million things at once. So are my priorities out of wack?! I focus on work now, I'm going to focus even MORE on work now. So the 200+ hours a month might increase. I'll focus on me now, I plan on going to Virginia Beach next weekend (if my boss lets me take Columbus Day off), I just need to get out of NJ, and get the hell away from NY too.

I don't want to date anymore. I don't want to do this anymore. I just want to be happy doing something else. Whatever else, just not the like/love/dating/relationship thing. I want to travel, I want to go somewhere FAR away, by myself, and just be. Not necessarily trying to run away from anyone or anything, I just think I need that freedom, and to be away from him, our mutual friends....I definitely need to stay far away from Facebook for a while. So you know what that means, lucky you I get to blog more often. :]

Mantra

"There is always something to do. There are hungry people to clothe, sick people to make well. And while I don't expect you to save the world, I do think its not asking too much for you to love those with whom you sleep, share the happiness of those with whom you call friend. Engage those among you who are visionary and remove from your life those who offer you depression, despair and disrespect." -Nikki Giovanni

My new mantra...